The Simple Secret to Cutting Your Ego In Half

The basic assumption we all have a tendency to make is --
I know what I'm doing,
and if I fail to get what I want, it's not my fault.

We give ourselves credit for the good things we achieve,
but pass the buck ever so easily for our mistakes and failures.

Scientifically, one could argue that happy, confident people
are (slightly) delusional.

There are myriad self-serving biases,
served up on a daily basis,
by all of us,
a handful of "saints" and "monks" aside.

Would you be surprised if I told you
I'm an excellent driver.

But not only am an an excellent driver,
I'm more honest,
more ethical,
more impartial than average.

And I'm not surprised if you say the same thing
about yourself, and your motivations
are probably purer than average.

And you think you handle your liquor
better than average.

Oh, but our weakness are common,
just part of being human,
essentially trivial, fuhgeddaboudit.

I'm going to live ten years longer than
the statistical average --
I'm sure you are too.

If you're successful,
it's because of your innate talents,
your innate you-ness.
More importantly, it could not have been otherwise.

Because of your you-ness (and success)
it's inconceivable that you could have been a failure.

If you fall from success,
it won't be your fault --
some external circumstance will be to blame.

On the scale of memory,
scientifically we remember success
more than failure.

***
The real question, as I write these words,
is do you believe that the things I'm talking about
don't affect you as much as they would others --
these cognitive biases, dissonances, etc?

It's a delicate balance --
to those who know me personally,
they may have reached a point where
I talk too much about the concept of --
"Killing One's Ego."

What I've found is (and I'll have to research
Carl Jung to know specifically where he says this)
that Jung was right --
One needs a really BIG ego in the first place,
to actually have a chance of KILLING one's ego.

So this balance --
self-serving biases are too essential to living a happy life --
you need to first be able to do this --
to delude yourself into being happy --
and even be happy, just happy,
albeit openly deceitful (to yourself and others) --
without even giving room to the notion
of ego destruction, just yet.

Stay deluded, then, for auld lang syne.

Optimistic people stay at task
longer than pessimists;
the optimistic have more friends;
on top of the self-esteem.

We'll get to ego destruction once I know
you're finally bored with the bloated ego stage.

For now, odds are,
you've learned one thing better than all else:
helplessness.

Your ego isn't big enough,
because it's been beaten out of you.